Mentally, I was moving on to my next nighttime task and the question caught me a bit off guard. I was not quite sure how to answer, but, eventually, I managed to say, "Well, I don't really know for sure because we can't see the angels, but many people believe that we do have guardian angels. What do you think? Do you have a guardian angel?"
Without hesitation, she answered "Yes! Aunt Marg is my angel."
(Aunt Marg is my husband's great aunt. She was like a pseudo-grandmother to him and she passed away shortly after we found out we were pregnant for the third time. Emily's middle name is Margaret in remembrance of Aunt Marg.)
After that, Emily's emotions turned to sadness. "It's not fair," she said, "that sissies got to meet Aunt Marg and I didn't because she died before I was born. I wish I got to meet her and your Mamaw, too."
These are things for which no parenting "How To" book could ever prepare you.
"I know," I said. Then, I attempted to comfort her by saying, "You will meet them all some day in Heaven." Since this did not seem to console her, I attempted to change the subject. "What do you think Heaven is like?" I asked.
She smiled and her face brightened a tad. "Oh, it's pretty Mommy!" Then, she described to me in detail what the castles will look like. She told me that all the girls get fancy, sparkly wings and all the boys get pretty wings, too, but they aren't sparkly because boys don't like sparkles.
Eventually, the conversation ended with her still upset about the people she has never met, but feeling a bit comforted by thoughts of Heaven and pretty things.
A little over a week later, as we were leaving church, this conversation happened:
Emily: My [Sunday School] teachers told us that if you close your eyes and listen really hard, sometimes you can hear God and when we were saying the prayer [The Lord's Prayer] in church I did that and I really did hear Him!
Me: Really? That's awesome! What did He say to you?
Emily: He said my name and told me he loves me and told me to be good.
Again, I was a bit taken aback by her statements.
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Really, these conversations shouldn't have surprised me all that much. You see, Emily has always had this innate relationship with God. Although I don't talk about it much here on the blog, we are Christians - Presbyterians to be exact - and we are very involved with our church. However, her connection to a higher power goes much deeper than the basic Sunday School lesson or the rote memory verses. It always has.
This, however, is not a post about God or Christianity or even religion in general. This is a post about FAITH.
Dictionary.com defines faith as:
- confidence or trust in a person or thing
- belief that is not based on proof
Another definition I recently read and love (which actually comes from the Bible) says "Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen." (Hebrews 11: 1)
After that first conversation with her, I could not get this song out of my head. It is by a Christian Music group named Jars of Clay. The song is called (Faith) Like A Child.
Faith like a child. Faith that is instinctive and whole. Faith that is not weakened by things of the world like disappointment or fear. Faith that just is.
That's the kind of faith Emily has - faith like a child because she is a child. Her faith hasn't been weakened by loss or hurt or knowledge of evil in the world. Her faith is innocent and pure. She sees the good without question. She believes without doubt.
Emily's faith amazes me and I can't help but wonder how much more wonderful our world would be if more of us had faith like a child. Faith like Emily. Faith in whatever higher power you choose to believe in. Faith in others. Faith in ourselves. Simple, whole-hearted, perfect faith.
Emily's faith amazes me and I can't help but wonder how much more wonderful our world would be if more of us had faith like a child. Faith like Emily. Faith in whatever higher power you choose to believe in. Faith in others. Faith in ourselves. Simple, whole-hearted, perfect faith.
