Thursday, October 31, 2013

The Scariest Things About Motherhood

When you hear someone say"Motherhood" what are some of the first words that pop into your mind ??

Children?  Of course.
Love?  Yes. It's a beautiful thing.
Snuggles?  Oh, those are nice aren't they?
Protectiveness?  Yes.  Mothers are fiercely protective of their offspring.

What about scary?  No??
Maybe horror??  Not on the top of your list?

While motherhood is wonderful and beautiful and all of those pleasant things, any mom will tell you that it can also be super scary.  Most moms have at least a few horror stories to share as well.

In honor of Halloween, here is my list of the scariest things about Motherhood:


1.  Labor and Delivery - Pain, screaming, crying, uncertainty - It's frightening!
2.  The Unknown - I like things to be predictable and scheduled.  That's not possible in parenting.  From the moment you conceive, there are millions of things that could go wrong.  As they grow, they can get sick or hurt or lost.  The "what ifs" will drive you mad if you let them!
3.  Toys - Sometimes I think the toys are taking over my house like aliens invading the planet.  Have you sever stepped on a Lego while barefoot??  Have you ever tried to get play dough out of carpet? Have you ever seen Chucky??  
4.  Bodily Fluids - Motherhood is full of poop, urine, vomit, snot, and occasionally blood.  It's gross.
5.  Traveling - Have you ever taken a road trip with a kids?  There is usually screaming, arguing, whining, crying, and, frequently, some of those bodily fluids I alluded to above.  Terrifying.
6.  Public Opinion - No matter what you do as a mom, someone will always find fault with it.  Breast vs. bottle; Stay at home vs. working; co-sleeping vs. sleep training; spanking vs. time-out - the list goes on and on.  If we let the advice of others get under our skin, it can be very scary!
7.  Sleep deprivation - This is a classic.  From newborns to sick school age kids to waiting up for teenagers to get home - moms are regularly sacrificing sleep to care for their minions.  This can turn moms into very creepy Mommy Zombies.  
8.  Money - Kids are expensive - period.  That means that finances can often get rather tight.  It can feel like you are suffocating under a mountain of "I need this" and "I want that."  Money - or lack thereof - can induce panic attacks of epic proportion.
9.  Raising teenagers - Mine aren't teenagers yet, but I'm already scared.  Psychotic mood swings, late night prowling, and knock-down drag-out fights are all part of the package.  (Or so I've been told!)
10.  Meltdowns - With all of the above, meltdowns are inevitable.  Kids have tantrums.  Moms lose control.  Even dads can freak out from time to time.  There may not be menacing music playing in the background to foreshadow the danger, but you can still see it coming.  When you do, RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!!!!! 

Are you convinced, now, that motherhood can be scary?? Yes? No?

Well, either way, you need to check out this book!

In it, thirty moms, including me, are sharing some of our most horrifying tales from the trenches of motherhood.  There are tales of labor pains gone awry, terrifying unknowns, and toys that led to disaster.  It has poop sagas and traveling nightmares.  There are debacles borne form unsolicited public input and sleep deprivation tragedies.  Finally, you will find finance fiascos and teenager terror.  If you like a good scare (or a good laugh; or a good cry) this book is for you! 

Trust me, it's VERY SCARY!!  (And, funny, emotional, moving, happy, etc.) 

Get your copy today!
Available through AMAZON or BARNES & NOBLE.



47 comments:

Janine Huldie said...

Lisa, yes to all of the above and will say mine aren't teenagers yet, but I am throughly frightened for this years. God help us! You summed about scary for mothers quite nicely here and just happy that we conquered this together today!! :)

The Next Step said...

Yeah, you pretty much nailed all the scary parts about being a mom! Of course, having 3 girls, I'm going to have to add: Prom.

Kenya G. Johnson said...

Great post! I was so scared of the "unknown" of delivering a baby. I was in the hospital week before - all the nurse said was that I had a pretty belly and he would "about" 8 lbs. I'm sure she knew looking and my belly that he was at the least 10! If I had gotten pregnant again I would have feared that the most - now L&D makes the unknown a cake walk. Great intro to the book - I haven't finished it yet.

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Mine aren't quite teens yet either, but my lodes started middle school this year, so I'm getting close. I'm terrified! :-)

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Yes! I have three girls as well and prom will be very scary, I'm sure! (And weddings)

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Hope you are enjoying the book! My third was 10 lbs when she was born. Can't imagine if she had been my first! Very scary! :-)

Michelle Nahom said...

This is all so true!! I have to say though while I had terrible labor and deliveries, nothing prepares you for #2 and the panic you feel when you lose sight of a little one and fear they are lost, or they have a major medical condition, or they get hurt and have to go to the ER....I could go on and on. That saying about your heart living outside of your body with children is really true. I can handle anything that happens to me, but when it involves my kids, it's a lot more stressful.

Karen @ BakingInATornado said...

So it turns out that October was the perfect month to roll out this book.

Ginnymarie said...

What a great list! I know I'm afraid of the teenaged years, and they are on their way. My oldest turns 9 next week! I can hardly believe how old she's getting!

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Amen!! My middle one is mischievous and I have lost her twice - each time was only for a few seconds, but there is nothing as scary! (In fact, I almost wrote one of those stories for the book!)

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Ha! Yep! :-)

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

I know! My oldest is 11 and started middle school this fall. It is terrifying! :-)

Emily (OhBoyMom) said...

Great list! I have 2 teenagers (boys) right now, and so far, it's not so scary except for maybe their messy rooms. I have no idea what could be living in there.

Tina Ashburn said...

Great list!!! Boy, I can tell you each of those is true! Why do they spend so much time to tell you HOW to have a baby but they don't tell you WHAT to do with it afterward?

Melissa Swedoski said...

What a wonderful list, and let me tell you, #4 is my constant question: why is there always vomit? How can such tiny little bodies expel so much? I'm a grown woman and I can't spew like that! Great post!

MommiFried said...

Such a great list! I just completed #1 for the fifth and final time. And #7 has already set in! Scary being a mom! :)

Tamara Bowman said...

Bodily fluids are very scary! Which is funny because some of the most disgusting (poop) are the most common, so you get a little desensitized to them. And vomit, which is very rare, is my worst. Luckily it's very rare.
I think the amount of toys that litter the floor every day is VERY scary.

MamaRabia said...

Motherhood...such a wild combination of adjectives can be used to describe it!!

The Dose of Reality said...

LOVE your list! Am nodding along to all of them! I swear to God, toys take over my home every single night. I think they are like Gremlins! ;)-Ashley

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Oh my goodness! My nine year old daughter's room looks like a disaster zone constantly! It is certainly scary!

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Amen to that! :-)

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Right??? My two lodes girls were terrible spitter-uppers (is that a phrase?) when they were babies. It was like watching the exorcist every time they ate!

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

God bless you!! I remember the days of constant sleeplessness and cannot even imagine doing it again now! If I was closer, I would be more than happy to snuggle that little guy for a while so you could take a nap! (((HUGS)))

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

I think the toys multiply in the night when we aren't looking. ;-)

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Yup! I thought as the kids got older there would be fewer toys, but now there's just so much STUFF!! Ugh!~

Amber Day Hicks said...

I absolutely LOVED this book & will read it over & over again!!! it was fantastic!!! Kudos!!!!

Stephanie Rufa said...

Your list hits pretty much all of the biggies. I find the unknowns to get the better of me sometimes. I'll wake up at night thinking about various things I can't control, nor would I really want to. Control freaks do not like unknowns!

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Thank you so much Amber! Glad you loved it!

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

I'm a control freak, too. The unknown is definitely a very scary thing!

Bonnie Frank said...

This is a great list! All true...I have pinned this to my "parenting" board on Pinterest.

Dana said...

Great list, Lisa! So far, raising a teen hasn't been any scarier than raising younger kids - fingers crossed that it stays that way!

Stephanie said...

That was an awesome post and I LOVED your picture!! Motherhood is stinkin scary. I'm just happy if we all make it through the day and everyone is still amongst the living. And don't even get me started on the unknowns...

Deb @ Urban Moo Cow said...

Ha! Awesome take on it. Still mourning my sleep loss. I will never stop grieving...

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Thanks Bonnie!

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

That's good to know! Hope it stays that way, too!

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Thanks Stephanie! General consensus seems to be that the unknown are the most terrifying part!

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Me, too!! (And my youngest is 6!)

Betty Taylor said...

You are so right! Motherhood can be extremely scary. I loved the book!! I followed you on BlogLovin.

Kristi - Finding Ninee said...

I love how you made the book cover look scary! And yeah, motherhood is SO scary. All of it all the time. It never would have occurred to me prior to being a mother how many scary things exist in life (piers, anybody? YIKES - I have nightmares about my son falling off one and me diving in to get him!). Also you got me on a good scary day. My son had a poop accident in his pants. Needless to say, I ended up throwing out two washcloths because there was no way they'd ever touch my face again.

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Thank you so much Betty!

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Yikes!! Poop is scary. I have just thrown away several paris if kid's undies because trying to clean them was just too gross!

TK said...

This is the perfect list of all things scary about motherhood. It's a tough job in itself, I wish it wasn't so fear-inducing as well!

Jodi @the noise of boys said...

Labor was my number 1 fear! well, prior to having the munchkins! Still debating baby #3....Kinda over my head anyway :-)

Herchel Scruggs said...

My biggest fear when my kids were newborns. I could not go to sleep if they were awake and I would wake up numerous times to poke the baby and make sure they were ok.

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Thanks, TK!

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

I wasn't scared of labor until I experienced it! (Hence my story in the book!) :-)

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Oh yes! I remember the first time mine actually slept through the night. It was supposed to be joyous, but I woke up realizing they hadn't woken up and rushed to their cribs fearing they were dead. Very scary!

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...