Tuesday, September 2, 2014

10 Parenting Skills I would Like To Learn {#TuesdayTen Linkup}


We are constantly learning, aren't we? At least, we should be. We may not have some enormous revelation each and every day, but we pick up little tidbits all the time through television, social media, and the people we encounter. It's what we are all sending our kids back to school right now or setting up shop to home school - we want them to learn.

Want to learn something right now? 

September is National Self Improvement Month! (See? There is your factoid for the day!)

In honor of back to school season and Self Improvement Month, Rabia and I thought it would be fun to list some things that we still want to learn. I decided, however, to put a little parenting spin on it.

We all know that there is no standard issue instruction manual given to parents at the hospital when a new baby is born. Oh, we get all kinds of advice, but it is up to us to sift through it and figure out what works for us and for our children.

I am by no means a parenting expert. I have, however, been a parent for a little over 12 years and, in that time, I have learned a thing or two. I'm still learning, though. My children perplex me on a daily basis. I am constantly figuring out new strategies and gaining new insights. No matter how hard I may try, though, I simply cannot seem to master these skills!


  1. How to stop my kids from being picky eaters. I have tried offering them new foods many, many times. I have tried sending them to bed hungry if they don't eat the supper that is prepared for them. I have tried rewarding (Oh, alright, bribing) them with sweets. Nothing works. They are still picky and it is still extremely frustrating. Perhaps, someday, I will learn a strategy that actually works.
  2. How to stop my kids from bickering with each other. Sometimes they get along. A lot of times, they do not. The bickering is maddening and I would LOVE to learn how to make them stop - instantaneously and forever!
  3. How to make my children go straight to sleep when I put them to bed. No more sudden ailments or hunger pains. No more imagined noises or remembering something they forgot. In bed; lights out; BOOM - asleep!
  4. How to get my children to do homework without complaining. We have been back in school for only a week, but, already, it has begun. One of my girls threw a fit one day because she had to spend 20 minutes reading one afternoon. When homework time comes, they whine, procrastinate, and get downright mad. If only I could learn how to make them enjoy it instead!
  5. How to get my kids to clean up after themselves. Everywhere they go they make a mess. They leave shoes, cups, food wrappers, toys, and "stuff" everywhere. I have instructed and modeled the behavior I want from them, but it doesn't seem to do any good. I wish someone could teach me how to teach them this skill!
  6. How to make them wake up happily and promptly each morning. Yes, I said I want to learn how to make them go to sleep, but I also want to learn how to make them get up. The first week of school wasn't bad, but it won't last, I'm sure. I don't blame them because I am not a morning person either. Maybe, in the future, we will all learn to love mornings.
  7. On a more serious note, How to determine if an aliment is really serious enough to go to the doctor. "My throat hurts!" "My stomach hurts!" Then, there are random rashes and phantom fevers. A a person with no formal medical training, it is hard to know when to brush it off or when to seek professional evaluation. 
  8. How to capture ALL-THE-MOMENTS and remember them forever. I have photo albums. I have pictures stored on CD's and on my computer. I made baby books for all three of my girls. But, still, there is so much I don't remember. I want to remember, though, every conversation, every giggle, every hug. I wish I could find away to memorize it all.
  9. How to make heartbreak heal instantly. Fortunately, my girls have not yet experienced much heartbreak, but they will, I know. I wish I could learn how to make that hurt go away instantly so they never have to feel that pain.
  10. How to shelter them from the world without sheltering them from the world. I want to travel the globe with my girls without having to explain why there is such stringent security at the airport. I want to turn on the TV for a weather forecast without having to carefully avoid all the murder and war stories. I want to set them free on social media without being terrified of what they will see, hear, or do. I want them to experience all the wonderful without worrying about all the bad.
(I actually wrote a post a couple years ago about real things I would like to learn. Fortunately, I have learned a few things about blogging and writing since then! It is poorly spaced, the writing is mediocre, and I lumped all the pictures in at the end. I've made some progress with some of the things on that list, but others I haven't even touched! If you would like to LEARN about the old list, just click HERE.)

Your Tuesday Ten hostesses are:

TheLiebers


The Teacher Wife
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The Golden Spoons

38 comments:

Dana said...

While I can relate to many of these, it is #10 that is what I'd like to learn the most. It's also impossible, and that's so hard to accept as a parent!

Kenya G. Johnson said...

This is definitely a wish list. I agree with #10 so much. Christopher has innocently watched some videos in youtube and clicked on some stuff i wish I could take back from his memory. For now he's not allowed on youtube anymore.

Janine Huldie said...

I agree with Kenya, because right there from that first one all the way to the end, I was thinking how nice each and every one of these would be to have even just once in awhile in my home with my girls, too!

Marcia Shaw Wyatt said...

It would be wonderful to be able to learn all of these things. They're all equally important, but I'm especially glad that you added # 8. Preserve as many memories as you can. Take videos, photos, write the memories down. Time moves so swiftly and children grow up so fast. Preserved memories are an excellent way to bring wonderful moments from the past back to the present ... and warm your heart all over again. :)

Eli @ Coach Daddy said...

This list shows you to be the caring, loving and present mom we know you to be, Lisa. beautiful.

#3: There's no way. You'd have an easier time teaching termites to go on the Atkins diet.

#6: food helps. Elise now wakes up cheerfully when I offer her her choice of breakfast foods. But at one time, she greeted my waking call with actual kicks to my person. Mind you, she was in high school at the time.

#9: I'm not at this point either, yet. But i will surely wallow with them and offer that there is no quick heal to heartbreak. no matter what your best friends try to tell you.

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Yes, it is indeed impossible, unfortunately. Had to put it on the list, though - if I could figure that out, none of the others would matter!

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Yes! When we went to San Francisco, it was my girls' first time in a "big city." We had to explain far too many things that I wish we didn't have to.

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Amen! In fact, I don't have to learn all 10 - I would settle for just a couple!

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

I treasure the memories so much. Sometimes I have to remind myself to slow down and take it all in. It does go by way too fast, for sure!

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Thanks, Eli! Unfortunately, I don't think any of these are very possible! We try the best we can and as long as they know they are loved, they will be o.k. (I hope!)

Kristi - Finding Ninee said...

Aw! Number 10 made me a little teary. I love your list though and please do promise to share when you figure out number one because I swear that Tucker eats about 15 things. And he won't even try the rest! Just won't even try! And number eight. How to keep all the moments? Oh and number nine because it will kill me when our kids get their hearts broken... ok fine, let me know when you learn any of them okay because clearly I need to learn all as well! Great list, Lisa! Pinned it to my Parenting & Life board to remember it.

Rea Alducente said...

Aww this is a nice twist of your list! I hope I can also learn to teach my son not to be picky and to eat at the right times of the day. Most of the things you've listed I'll surely be going through once my son starts going to school.

Chris Carter said...

YES to ALL of this Lisa!!! Oh, if only... sigh.

Brittnei Washington said...

These are funny. I bet learning how to accomplish these things would make your life seem calmer and easier. Though they seem ideal for most parents, I bet they change with time and everyone even the parents might learn something new about it...like the bickering one. I remember when me and my little brother did it when we were growing up, but then there came a time later on I think when we were in like high school where I don't really remember really ever doing it. I bet my mom was ecstatic about that. :)

Kerith Stull said...

In an ideal world..... But like "The Dog Whisperer", I think parenting is so much about training US and then let it work its way down to the little ones. Put those goals somewhere where you can see them and be reminded to work on them every day!

Tamara Bowman said...

8, 9 and 10 put a lump in my throat, my friend.
Ultimately I wish that the most for all of us.

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Thanks, Kristi! They are probably all just pipe dreams, but if I ever do figure them out I will certainly share. And, ugh, the picky eaters - so frustrating! thanks for pinning, too!

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Thanks! One of my daughters is super picky, one is kind of picky, and the third is not very picky at all. Strange how they are so different!

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Right?!?!?!? :-)

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Yes, it would! I would gladly give up all the others if I could get that one!

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

My girls go through phases with the bickering. Right now they are getting along pretty well. It might last for a couple weeks, then they will be back to fighting like cats & dogs for a while!

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Great advice! Thanks!

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

I wish that for all of us, too, Tamara!

Kristi - Finding Ninee said...

Anytime! :)

MamaRabia said...

I could ditto this whole list!! Motherhood involves a ton of on the job learning, but I don't think these topics have been covered enough.

Carin Kilby Clark said...

I love this list... and oh man, number 8! A few years ago I started journaling specifically to record my memories of each child (I have 3). It's so hard because the details fade and the day-to-day craze makes it to difficult to experience every moment. Love that quote about learning too.

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Definitely not! There should be some kind of training course!

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Thanks Carin! I have three as well - all girls. Life gets so busy and it is just so hard to soak it all in!

Tarana said...

That's a great list! I wish meal times and bedtimes were easier too. And how to stop the whining and complaining!

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Yep! In a perfect world. :-)

Jill Robbins said...

I struggle with #7. I don't know how many times I've brushed something off as "you're fine" only to get the dreaded phone call from the nurse...

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

That one is so tough. I feel awful if I just brush it off, but I simply can't run to the doctor for every single ailment either. It's so hard to know!

Meredith said...

I already commented on this once I think, but had to again. I really wish I could do #10. Sometimes, I watch the news and am terrified that my kids are inheriting such a scary place. But, I also try to remember that the world needs people being raised by good families. That's what I'm hoping to do.

Stephanie Sprenger said...

Toddler cooperation. That pretty much sums it up. :) :) And how to have a less hectic morning! Great ideas here, Lisa!

TheMissusV said...

#3 please! I have heard all the possible excuses from my kids. :(

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Yes - #10 is so hard. I hope that my kids will make it a better place and that I'm teaching them how right now.

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Thanks, Stephanie! I'm past the toddler stage, but I remember the days when that would have been #1 on my list, too!

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Fortunately, my kids are doing better with that one lately. I think they are just more tired now from school, etc.

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