Wednesday, March 4, 2015

Mysteries of Motherhood

I recently finished reading Gone Girl. (Yes, I know I am terribly behind the times.) The whole book is about mysteries. Amy has disappeared, but where is she? What happened? Who did it? Not to mention the anniversary treasure hunt mysteries her husband, Nick, is trying to solve. It got me thinking about all the mysteries I’m trying to solve every single day.

The 10 Greatest Mysteries of Motherhood
  1. Why do my kids complain profusely when I wake them up on school mornings and act as if they are part of some zombie brigade, yet on the weekend they are up at the crack of dawn?
  2. Why do my kids ALWAYS have a growth spurt right at the end of a season when the stores have already changed out their stock for the next season? Have you ever tried to find snow boots in February??
  3. How do they always know the second I sit down and suddenly need something right then?
  4. This is also the case when I am on the phone or in the bathroom. Everything instantly becomes ten times more urgent. Why, Why, Why??????
  5. Why am I the only one in the house capable of putting dirty dishes in the dishwasher? It’s really not that far form the sink, people!
  6. Why do they always argue with me about taking a bath/shower, but, once they are in, I can’t get them out?
  7. How can they like a particular food one day and, the next day, find that same food to be utterly repulsive?
  8. Seriously, where are the parents on 99.9% of the Disney shows and who comes up with all that ridiculously annoying stuff anyway? Has anyone ever seen Max & Ruby’s parents? Do Austin and Ally actually go to school at any point? Why do kids find these shows so appealing? How many brain cells have my children lost while watching this type of mindless drivel?  Okay - that’s several mysteries wrapped into one, but I could go on about this one all day!
  9. Common Core math. Enough said.
  10. Finally, where in the heck do all the missing socks go???????
If you happen to know the answers to any of the mysteries on this list, please, for the sake of all humanity, share your wisdom with the rest of us!



What mysteries of motherhood have you perplexed today??

This post was part of the new One Word Blog Linkup hosted my Janine of Confessions of a Mommyholic, Marica of Blogitudes, and me! This week, the word prompt choices were Lost and Truth. If you would like to join the linkup you can find more information HERE, sign up for weekly emails HERE, and/or join our Facebook group HERE. Every Friday, two prompts are emailed. Choose one and write a post using that owrod as inspiration. Linkup up any time between 6:00am EST on Wednesday-9:00pm EST on Thursdays on any of the host sites!

   

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33 comments:

Janine Huldie said...

First off, I also read Gone Girl and the amount of mysteries and twists, WOW! Also, a double WOW to the mysteries of motherhood, as I most definitely can relate to all of the above, including Common Core Math even with kindergartener, which has a former math teacher says a mouthful for these standards in a nutshell!

MamaRabia said...

I would seriously pay good money to have these questions answered!!

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Me too!!!!

Janine Huldie said...

I know and I heard the movie ending was even worse if you could imagine!

Marcia Shaw Wyatt said...

I'm another mystified reader of Gone Girl. Much enjoyed the read ... until I got to the ending. Ugh! So dissappointed. Your Mom Mysteries, however, were thoroughly enjoyable, Lisa - right up to the end and past it. :) Your post gave me a good laugh and scratch of the head. Don't know the answers to the questions you asked - but so glad you asked them anyway. Love this post! :)

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Yes, I was very disappointed with that ending - so anti-climatic after such a great book.

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Yikes! I haven't seen he movie, but I definitely can't imagine it being any worse!

Jeannine (@EubanksEutopia) said...

I wish I knew the answers to a single one of your questions. I have all the same problems at my house.

Corinne Rodrigues said...

A lot of moms I know would totally relate to this! :)

Chris Carter said...

AMEN sister mama!!! Oh, there are SO many mysteries of this motherhood world we live in!!! Why do my kids fight over the STUPIDIST THINGS!!! Yeah- I wrote a word that doesn't exist... but really, WHY??? I just told my son today that every time he taddles on his sister, he will go to bed ten minutes earlier. He's all "What about CASSIDY??"

I said, "There's ten minutes."

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Well, at least I'm not alone!

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Thanks!

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Ha! I told my youngest last night that every time she whined I was taking 10 minutes of her bedtime! Great minds, my friend, great minds!!! :-)

TheMissusV said...

I've been wondering about the same things! Let me know when you have the answers! LOL

Sarah said...

Yes! Especially 3, 4, & 10. Glad I'm not alone!

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

If I ever do find all the answers, I'll be a billionaire!! :-)

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

You are definitely not alone! :-)

Dana said...

These truly are life's mysteries. I think there is a missing sock fairy who has built an entire city with our socks!

Tarana said...

Oh, these are so true, especially 3 and 4!

Stephanie Sprenger said...

The math! The socks! These all kill me, too...

Tamara Bowman said...

I know nothing of common core math.. yet.. but the socks thing. Where on earth do they go? It's weird. Both kids are missing so many socks. Are they in a socks graveyard?
And mine are great at asking me for something when I finally sit down.

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

They have to be somewhere, right??

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Yep. Every single time! :-)

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

I think those two may be the worst ones!

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

There must be some cosmic sock graveyard somewhere. There has to be. There is no other explanation.

Kristi - Finding Ninee said...

Every. Single. Snow day. Tucker's up at like 6 or 6:30. When he has school? I have to wake him up. This is hilarious Lisa and so so relatable. Ugh to the dishwasher too! :)

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Thanks, Kristi!

Rea Alducente said...

The dirty dishes and the missing socks most especially! When I arrive home from work early morning, I see piles of plates in the bedroom! In the bedroom! Sheesh.

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Oy! I was cleaning up this weekend and found all kinds of stuff that was weirdly out of place.

AnnMarie said...

Yes, Yes, Yes!!! All of them. #7 drives me bananas. We might be raising the same kids. If anyone gives you answers, let me know. Why do my kids always walk in the room while an inappropriate moment is happening on a TV show I've waited a week to watch. (Breaking Bad, Vikings, Sons of Anarchy, Law and Order SVU)

thenotsosupermom said...

6!!! NUMBER 6!!!! ALWAYS!!!

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Oh, that's a good one!

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Glad to know I'm not the only one!

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