Tuesday, May 12, 2015

The Worst Holidays Ever {#TuesdayTen}

We have celebrated a lot of weird holidays in the name of Tuesday Ten. We have even created our own holidays! When we read that May 2 was another weird holiday, National Naked Gardening Day, our first thought was "Ewwwww! Gross!" Then, our second thought was "We need to use that for Tuesday Ten somehow!" Rabia thought it would be the perfect opportunity to list some holidays that we would NEVER actually celebrate! So, while I will happily honor National Chocolate Day, National Coffee Day, and even National Lazy Moms Day, here are some special days that I simply refuse to celebrate even though, believe it or not, they are actual holidays! 
  • According to www.daysoftheyear.com, this Friday, May 15 is Nylon Stocking Day to which I can only say "Whyyyyyy???" Obviously, the person who thought we needed a day to celebrate pantyhose has never actually worn pantyhose (especially in May!). I will not be wearing or celebrating these articles of discomfort and frustration on Friday or any other day.
  • Another May holiday that is celebrated in Bolivia is the Tinku Punch Your Neighbor Festival. This holiday dates back over 600 years and was supposedly begun to please an ancient goddess who demanded blood to ensure a good harvest, so the idea is to punch your neighbor hard enough (or multiple times) to actually draw blood. Well, aside from the fact that this holiday is incredibly bizarre and just plain awful, I am a very non violent person. Also, since my neighbors are actually my in-laws, celebrating this holiday would not be good for family relations.
  • On a more peaceful note, January 9 is Ballon Ascension Day. Back in 1793, when George Washington was president, a man named Jean Paul Blanchard made the first successful balloon flight in North America and this celebration was born. I, however, do not like heights and there are very few things that terrify me more than the idea of going hundreds of feet up in the air in a basket attached to a large balloon which is fueled by fire and hydrogen and only somewhat steerable. Thus, I have no plans to celebrate Balloon Ascension Day. Ever. 
  • Developed by a guy who simply wanted to disprove the superstition, March 13 is Open An Umbrella Indoors Day. (Seriously, y'all -I couldn't make this stuff up if I tried.) This day is not particularly bothersome to me. It's my husband I would be concerned about. He is a very intelligent man, but is oddly superstitious and definitely has a thing about opening umbrellas indoors. If we celebrated this holiday in my house, it would not be pretty.
  • Hug Your Cat Day is June 4th. I am not a "cat person" which is good because I am highly allergic felines. I don't own a cat to hug and, if I was to hug someone else's cat, I would be creating for myself an allergy attack of epic proportions. No thanks.
  • When I was pregnant with my third child, I developed an aversion to seafood that, even more than seven years later, has not completely gone away. Any seafood served raw or cold truly makes nauseous. So, it's safe to say that I will not be celebrating International Sushi Day on June 18.
  • By July 5, summer will be in full swing, so I suppose that is a very fitting date for Bikini Day, a day to celebrate the invention of the bikini, but my midsection hasn't seen sunlight since high school. After three kids and a large handful of not-so-attractive stretch marks, it's pretty safe to say that I will never don a bikini ever again. Tankini Day? Maybe. Bikini? No way.
  • Some people are blessed with a "green thumb." I, on the other hand, have been cursed with the "Black Thumb of Death." Honestly, I just look at houseplants and they die, so it would probably best for all the housepants of the world for me to not celebrate Take Your Houseplant For a Walk Day on July 27. (I'm not kidding - that's really a day you guys!)
  • Other than my aforementioned seafood aversion, there are a few other foods I do not like including avocados, mushrooms, and tomatoes which is why I will not be participating in La Tomatina, a day celebrated on the last Wednesday of August in Buñol, Spain that basically consists of a 90 minute food fight - except the only food used is tomatoes. Yes, friends - on this day, Spaniards take joy in pummeling each other with tomatoes. Despite my best efforts at research, I could find no explanation for this odd "celebration." 
  • Finally, if any of you reading this blog post consider yourselves to be pyromainacs, you are more than welcome to take my place in Bolas de Fuego on the 31st of August in Nejada, El Salvador. This holiday dates back to 1685 and was originally meant to be a reenactment of a fight between San Geronimo and the devil which is how people of that time explained the eruption of a local volcano. How does a population celebrate the eruption of a volcano, you ask? Well, apparently, by throwing flaming, fuel soaked rags at one another. Suddenly, bikini day doesn't sound so bad, huh?
In doing research for this post - which was quite fun - I discovered that really anyone can create a holiday. Simply go HERE and to find out how to submit an entry. After reading this list of outlandish, ridiculous celebrations I'd say that your idea, no matter how crazy, stands a pretty good chance of becoming a reality! 

Would you participate in any of the special days I have listed here? What holiday would you create? (HERE are some of my ideas!)`

Your Tuesday Ten hostesses are:


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Janine Huldie said...

Just as I told Rabia, I am so with you and not celebrating any of these crazy holidays either!!! 😉

Val Newman said...

Bikini Day made my list, too. Thank you for hosting this fun blog hop. I sure loved reading all those funny holidays. The holiday I'd like to celebrate is Superbowl Monday - everyone has a day off to rest up after the party.

MamaRabia said...

Oh my gosh! These are great!! I might hug my cat, but I am not taking my dog to work with me (I don't have one and I don't like them!)

Dana said...

Well, that explains why some of these are so ridiculous...anybody can create a holiday! I would take my houseplant for a walk before I'd wear a bikini, though. Less embarrassing!

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

This one was fun!

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

That sounds like a great holiday!!!

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

Well, you can have all the cats and I'll take all the dogs! :-)

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

For sure!!!! :-) I would probably even let people throw tomatoes at me before I'd wear a bikini!

Tamara Bowman said...

Nylon stockings in May? Not cool! That holiday should be in November or another dreadful month.
I suppose I could hug a cat for June 4th. One of mine likes hugs.
Cassidy loves to make sushi so maybe he'll do that on June 18th!

Lisa @ The Golden Spoons said...

I do wear pantyhose when it's cold, but I hate them then, too! No sushi for me, but if you like it, sounds like a great way to convince him to make dinner! :-)

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