Saturday, January 7, 2012

An Update on My Dilemma

On Wednesday, I wrote a blog post about my Parenting Dilemma.  First of all - WOW! - I asked for advice/suggestions and you all delivered!  I got comments on the blog, comments on Facebook, emails, and phone calls.  For a while, it was a bit overwhelming.  I guess that's why they say "be careful what you ask for. . . "  Anyway, I thought I would give everyone an update.

Lots of people suggested Locks of Love.  I had already suggested this to Rachel a couple weeks ago thinking that she is always ready and willing to help others in need.  She was interested at first, but when I mentioned the 10-inch requirement, I thought she might just pass out.  She quickly nixed the idea.  In all fairness, 10 inches would have put her hair above her shoulders and I know she would have disliked it intently.

After taking in everyone's advice, I mulled it all over.  Basically, I had a very blunt discussion with Rachel and explained that it was really about the bigger picture - how you present yourself.  Having unkempt hair (especially coupled with the yoga pants and t-shirts she wears almost every day) make you appear lazy; make you appear as if you don't respect yourself.  I told her, "You don't have to be like everyone else.  I love that you want to be unique.  Right now, though, your look doesn't reflect the beautiful, intelligent, creative person that you are.  It just says you are lazy and sloppy."  I told her that she would be getting a haircut, but she would have some choice.  She could get 3-4 inches cut like Mommy & Daddy wanted, and, if she did it cooperatively, she could then get a feather.  If she didn't want to cut that much, she could just get two inches cut, but she would not get a feather and if she did not cooperate, she would be grounded.  I told her that afterward, she was going to start doing her hair herself and I was going to do a better job of getting her regular trims, so we won't have to deal with such "dramatic" lengths again.

After a while, she came and asked me to show her exactly how much four inches would be.  I took her to the mirror and, with a ruler, showed her exactly how much it would be and how long her hair would still be if four inches came off.  Then, I did the same for two inches.

Believe it or not, she agreed to the four inches!!!  So, today, we went to my hair stylist.  Rachel sat with a scowl on her face for the majority of the time, but four inches came off and she eventually left with a smile and a neon green feather.  As a bonus, my stylist also straightened Rachel's hair with the flat iron which Rachel loves, but I rarely have time to do.  It turned out to be a lot of hubbub over something very small.  (Which seems to be a bit of theme with anything having to do with Rachel!)  Unfortunately, I don't have a picture to share.  Rachel hates to have her picture taken and, I may not have all the right parenting answers, but I do know enough to not push my luck. :-)

Thanks, again, to everyone who offered advice!

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1 comment:

snipsofsnailspuppydogtails said...

I think you handled the little dilemma beautifully! My middle son requires me to think outside the parenting box as well. Kuddos to the way you handled it!

Oh, and PS....your daughter is beautiful. I love her little freckles.

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