Wednesday, November 7, 2012

Silent Treatment

Last week, after "The Kitten Incident", I posted this as my status on my personal Facebook page:

"Getting the silent treatment from my oldest tonight. First time of many, I'm sure. I should probably be upset, but I'm kind if enjoying the quiet. ;)"

With three daughters, I am no stranger to emotional ups and downs, mood swings, and drama.  However, the silent treatment was a new one for me.  Rachel was upset that I had given the kitten to someone else and that I did not trust her to care for the kitten herself.  After we handed the kitten off, Rachel continued to cry as we made a mad dash to Emily's dance class and Rachel's gymnastics class.  When I picked her up from the gym, it was obvious that she was still harboring feelings of bitterness.  I asked her how her class went; she turned her head away silently.  I asked where they wanted to go grab dinner; she gave no response.  When we sat down at the fast food restaurant for a quick bite (please don't judge), she chose to seat herself at a separate table.  A couple of times while we ate, she deliberately addressed Megan and Emily but not me.  This type if thing continued up until bedtime.  After putting the other two girls to bed, I made my way to Rachel's room.  When I walked in, she was already in bed.  She rolled over, so as not to look in my direction, and pulled the covers over her head. I simply said, "I understand that you are upset and I am sorry that you are sad.  Just know that I love you more than you could possibly understand.  Sleep tight and I will see you in the morning." 

The next day, the girls happened to be out of school for a teacher workday and it also happened to be Halloween.  Rachel did actually speak to me, yet she made every effort to avoid me as much as possible.  As evidenced by her Halloween picture, she was fairly unhappy for pretty much the whole day.

I suppose I could have viewed the whole thing as disrespectful and become angry myself.  But that would have only escalated the drama.  On the other hand, I could have let it hurt my feelings that Rachel was mad at me.  But, I'm her mother, not her BFF.  So, I basically just took it all in stride and let it run its course.  To tell you the truth, I was pretty proud of myself for not getting too worked up over it.  After the crazy afternoon, the rush to get everyone to their extracurriculars, and then the silent drama, I guess I was just too tired to care.  Hopefully, the next time - and I am positive there will be a next time - I will be able to maintain my composure again and just enjoy the quiet!

Have your kids ever given you the silent treatment??  How did you handle it??  I would love to get some comments from others on this one!

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1 comment:

Martha said...

For what it's worth, I think you handled the situation perfectly. I probably would have pitched a fit when I went in to say good-night, so I'm impressed with your composure. I haven't had the silent treatment yet, but Georgia has pulled a few similar things on me and I'm not sure I've handled them as well as you did!

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