My first post was published on February 26, 2010. I had a funny story to share, I've always liked to write, and I had heard of this thing called "a blog" so I checked it out. I stumbled across Blogger/Blogspot which made it easy to create your own webpage and I just did it. I had no idea what I was getting myself into. I gave no thought to pageviews or social media or "marketing" myself. In the past three years, however, I have learned a lot - a lot about computer terminology; a lot about the friendly competitiveness of the blogging world; a lot about myself.
A couple years ago, I read some advice that suggested creating a mission statement for your blog to help keep you focused and on point. Although I never wrote one down, I did formulate somewhat of a mission statement in my head. Basically, I wanted my blog to serve a memories for my girls. I wanted to have it printed and bound eventually and give them copies when they are young mothers so they will have memories to share with their children. My hope was (and is) that, reading about my joys and struggles as a mom will somehow serve as wisdom and comfort for them. With every post, I asked myself "Will this matter to them when they are traveling down the path I'm on now?" If the answer was no, I didn't write it. I still want my blog to be all those things. Lately, however, I have found myself wanting my blog to be more.
I have revved up my presence on social media and joining Twitter and trying to post more frequently on my blog's Facebook page. I've also been reading tons of other blogs and commenting and blog hopping as much a I can in hopes that this thing will "take off." Why?? If I'm being honest, I think I am trying to find some sense of accomplishment for myself. Most of my days are the same old, same old. Kids, laundry, feeding the crew, dishes, bath time, bedtime - Wash, Rinse, Repeat. I feel kind of like a gerbil on one of those little wheels running and running and running but getting nowhere. Although I know mothering is the most important job I will ever have and that my kids are my greatest accomplishment(s), it is hard to keep that in mind when I'm in the trenches on a day-to-day basis.
I've seen others post about receiving hundreds of Facebook Likes in jus a few weeks; about thousands of page views on one post; about publishing books; about being featured on larger media outlets. Admittedly, at those times, that little green-eyed monster sits himself on my shoulder and I think "I want that, too. Maybe that's where I can find the sense of accomplishment that I seem to be missing." So, about a month ago, I decided to dive in and give it a go - to really TRY to make it happen rather than just sitting back and crossing my fingers, hoping for the best. In the past few weeks, I have spent many hours (hours when I should have been cleaning or exercising or hanging out with my kids and hubby) reading other blogs, commenting, tweeting, Facebook posting. It's been a lot more work than I realized it would be. My following has increased some, but not significantly.
I have learned that blogging is competitive in a friendly sort of way. There are literally thousands of mommy blogs and thousands more "other" blogs. Most everyone who blogs secretly hopes that one of their posts will go viral, get thousands of pageviews, and bring them a little bit of fame. (Ever heard of Pioneer Woman, Ree Drummond?? Yeah, like that!) When this happens for other bloggers we congratulate them and are truly happy for them. However, we are also a little disappointed that we are not in their shoes. At least I am. And, how do we measure that success?? Will it be enough when I have 500 Facebook likes? Maybe 1000?? 10,000? Maybe when my posts average a couple hundred pageviews each?? Or maybe when I'm featured on Huff Post?? Maybe when someone wants me to write a book?? What will it take for me to feel like I have finally jumped off the gerbil wheel and found success?
With all that in mind, I'm not sure I can finish this sentence yet. "I blog because . . ." I'm still figuring that out. I'm still doing it for my girls, but I'm still looking for something for myself, too. Those two purposes don't always seem to mesh. "For my girls is" where I started. "For myself" is where I've been heading lately. Right now, I'm trying to figure out if there is a way to balance those two ideals. If not, which one is right for me right now??
I honestly can't wait to read what others have to say - how others finish this sentence. Hopefully, by reading others' thoughts and giving it a little more time (and thought and prayer and discernment) I'll figure it out for myself and be able to finish that sentence with confidence.
